Thursday, April 17, 2008

Welcome to the Wasteland of Wankery

Remember how I mentioned in that post about Kendrix and that post about Kawaii that some Mary Sues and Gary Stus have an issue with the word 'waste?' I'm about to show you I didn't just pull that assessment out of my ass. Here is a list of Suethors misusing the word waste. Some of these you can laugh at and think, "Hee! She/He meant waist." And others, if you imagine waste means poop, are funny and cringe-worthy. Enjoy!

"Her bottom half is covered by a pair of three quarter length dark blue jeans with multiple pockets which are held up a brown leather belt around her waste."

"Mrs. Maltuise is very thin with pale skin and sparkling green eyes. Her hair is waste length, pink, and curly."

"As for her weapons, they are strung around her waste like some sort of belt under her coat and are called upon in battle or to aid her in situations."

"He rides a Warg known only and Thra'gra and has waste length greasy hair."

"Souffle is certainly not one to disagree, as she tries to draw even more attention to herself by wearing red bands around her waste and wrists, which compliment her silver hair and golden skin."

"Wherinu held his blade waste-length, slanting slightly upwards"

""Very and don't even think about it!" She held his hands down at her waste knowing hes much stronger than she is."

"It had looked as if it was made for her. It clung to every curve, till about her waste when it then just sort of flared out. It was a beautiful forest green color, and the tiny little sparkles on it shimmered in the firelight coming from the torches on the wall. Around her waste, the blood red silk sash was had been playing with early flowed down to about her knees."

"Jennifer in terms of human females, was extremely beautiful. She had soft white skin, wore regular street clothing and had waste length dark green hair."

"Two thick, cotton, white belts are cross tied on his waste for individuality."

"She sat motionless, her hands unmoving from the tight clasp around her waste. She breathed strenuously, forcing the hysterical laughter and sorrow out, collecting the broken pieces of her charade into a well-fit mask."

"Scarlet pushed her black hair back behind her ear. She was a tall woman, at 5'7" with waste-length straight black hair, pale skin, and eyes that were blacker than coal."

"Navy blue sweatshirt with hood over shirt if it's too cold (if she thinks it's warm enough, she wears it around her waste );"

"The blue armor is almost the same of the Legendary Hokage, except he incorporated the waist style of the First Hokage(giving him four plates at his waste) as well as well as the color; which has been set to off white."

"The he opened the cabinet at his waste and took out a spoon and put it into the bowl."

"His hair is a mix of almost metallic silver with white as pure and soft as the color of snow, and is naturally soft and silken, which is good considering the fact that it is almost waste length."

"As she thought this she felt a pair of strong arms wrap around her waste."

"to help ease the pain and stop the blood from freely flowing out the wound, he took the yellow cloth from around his waste and bound the wounded skin."

"Ilanis was suddenly awake. Throwing her waste length red hair up into two knots on her head and dressing herself in a blue leather top overtop of her nightdress."

"hair: other than side strands going back to a braid, it's free. Waste-length orange-gold hair slightly wavey."


"Out of one a pouch at his waste, he pulled an herb."


"As for weapons, she carries a dagger on her waste under her sash."

"Appearance: Wavy, red, waste-length hair; 5’5’’ and thin; slender; golden eyes; green, hooded jacket and black jeans."

"Below that she wore a long black skirt with ruffles at the end as well, though it was hiding her effects strapped around her waste underneath."

"He often wears his waste length black hair tied in a top knot with a black and blue ribbon."

"A long silky black tail rose from her waist and stood curling and uncurling behind her while two pointy and furry cat like ears protruded from her head amid the almost waste length raven black hair which was a stark contrast against the white of the dress and her pale skin. Her eyes two were different, more oval and oriental but her pupils stood vertically in their purple iris."

"She carries a silver sword around her waste and a silver dagger in her left boot both having blood stones at the top of the handles, while bow and arrows lie at her back."

"Officer's service uniform consists of a black, waste-length tunic with charcoal grey across the collar-bone and shoulders."

"Appearance: Laerwen has waste length golden-brown hair and dark brown eyes. She's not particularly pretty, nor is she ugly."

"He crawled out of bed wearing nothing but shorts as he walked up behind her, and wrapped his arms around her waste and rested his head on her shoulder looking out the window."

"Phys. Description: Marly has waste length raven black hair. She likes to wear it down."

"Physical Appearance: Vanyali has waste length blond hair with silver streaks through it."

"Around his waste are two different belts, a normal black leather belt with pyramid studs on it, and a belt to hold his gun holster."

"Magic: Able to use nearly all magic with his energy drained. He keeps magic stones on his belt around is waste."

"Maya was a wild child, waste length dark hair looking even longer on her toddler frame."

"Merrique wrapped an arm around his waste and smiled coyly at him."

"He has waste-length light brown hair that he tries to keep tied back, but it's rather fine, so strands often escape."

"The tongue pulled on his waste."

"Making sure his lightsaber was secure at his waste, he hustled on to the shack ahead, and to his old friend and information source."

"On her waste is a simple belt with six Pokeballs and on her back is a navy backpack also with a yellow G on it.

"Her flowy and elegant brown hair laid gracefully on her waste and her red wine dress flutteres in the wind."


"She started feeling me more after that and I started touching her waste"



2 comments:

Freaklin Gout said...

Haw! These were great! These two are my favorites:

"The he opened the cabinet at his waste and took out a spoon and put it into the bowl."

EWWWWW!

"The tongue pulled on his waste."

EWWWW again, but I'm not sure what that's supposed to mean eve if they did use the correct spelling of waist. How does a tongue pull on a waist?

PM said...

Don't cry, don't raise your eye... it's only teenage WASTE land Bo)