Mary Sue Jokes: Part Three

I don't know if these amuse anyone else but me but who cares? Enjoy!

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Three rpg characters are traveling in the Amazon; Mary Sue, Gary Stu, and Cadence. They get captured by some Amazons. The head of the tribe says to Mary Sue, "What do you want on your back for your whipping?" The Mary Sue responds, "I will take oil because even though my stepfather use to rape me and beat me, I am still a delicate flower!" So they put oil on her back, and a large Amazon whips her 10 times. When he is finished, Mary Sue has huge welts on her back and can hardly move. The Amazons haul the Mary Sue away. They say to Gary Stu, "What do you want on your back?" "I will take nothing!" Gary Stu says. He stands there straight and takes his 10 lashings without a single flinch. "What will you take on your back?" the Amazons ask Cadence. She responds, "I'll take Gary Stu!"

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How is a Mary Sue different from a 747?
Not everyone has been in a 747.

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A man walks into a bar and finds a Genie in a lamp. The Genie will only grant him one wish. The man wishes to be a million times smarter than any man on earth. *POOF* the Genie turns him into a Mary Sue!

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One day, God calls on Gary Stu and says, "Gary Stu, I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is that I gave you a penis and a brain. The bad news is that I only gave you enough blood to operate one organ at a time."

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What's a Tragic Sues favorite nursery rhyme?
Humpme Dumpme

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How do you save Gary Stu from drowning?
Take your foot off of his head.

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What do Tootsietramps and turtles have in common?
Once they're on their backs they're screwed!

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Why do Gary Stus have to flex their muscles around women so much?
Because they have nothing else to brag about.

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What's the difference between a Mary Sue and the Titanic?
They know how many went down on the Titanic.

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A bitchiwitch, a qanonreip and a sparklypoo walk into a bar.
The bartender looks up and says, "Is this some kind of a joke?"